You look peaceful lying there. Your wrinkled forehead is the smoothest it has looked in years, and there is a smile lifting the sagging skin of your cheeks. A nurse is speaking to you, but I cannot hear, only watch. You don’t try to respond; I’m not sure if you can even hear or understand her. Still, you smile a reassuring smile, as though she were on her deathbed and not you. Your eyes stray from the kind young lady sometimes, your vision drifting across the room as though looking for a friend in a crowd, but the only people in the room are you and your nurse.
I lean against the windowsill, the morning light passing thr
He's smoking again.
I am forced to remind myself that I shouldn't give a damn. I resolutely pretend I don't notice, even as his cigarette expels long silvery-grey strands into the frigid January air.
He hasn't seen me yet. The distance between us yawns forward, a wordless expanse. It could be a heartbeat away or an entire ocean, but it is neither, just a slushy street corner in a quiet town. It's the place I grew up, a little community where the only thing to do is drugs and nobody has ambition beyond tonight's rest.
I used to think it was beautiful. The gratified park benches told me stories; the Sharpie on the bridges let me know of ever
I enter a home unknown to me, although it is mine. I walk its rooms in slow meditation and will it to be more.
But its voices do not recognize me either. The chime of a bell above the door is shrill and questioning, chiding me for my presence. The tick of the clock is as strong as the tap of an impatient foot, seeking to usher me out as my welcome is spent. Even my steps on the floorboards are magnified, turned back on me in a rhythmic siege as I traverse the hallway.
Its skin has changed, and I can't feel whether its heart is the same. I grasp instead for a doorknob, and locking my hand around its misshapen oval, I welcome the mooring t
Memory is a joke. In what it retains and what it filters away, in what it chooses as important. Forgetting her face over the course of years, yet he always recalled how she had worn her socks that day. One hiked up to her knee, high, translucent blue. The other failing in the struggle, puddling opaque about her ankle.
The ways she had always failed in symmetry, one braid too loose, the other gleaming tight. One side of her skirt slanted lower than the other, dancing across her knees as she paced at the bus stop.
All of the imperfections that perfected a moment, glimpsed through the golden sheen that morning laid across his window. Her
People say when you are close to death your life flashes before your eyes. Right now, as death creeps upon me, I have to say that statement is false. I am a bit ahead of myself though, so allow me to rewind just a little.
We were driving home from my daughter’s eighth birthday, and for her party, as always, we went to Chuck E. Cheese’s. This was a tradition her mother, my late wife, Rebecca, started. Every year we would go to Chuck E. Cheese’s, the food was subpar and overpriced in my book, but Rebecca and Amy, our daughter, would laugh and play, enjoying all the different games. I couldn’t help but smile at the two,
I always used to ask when it would be just us again. “After the show,” he’d tell me. That’s what he’d always tell me. But each night the show never seemed to end.
In the beginning I believed him. I’d count the songs of the set off on my hand, and as the band piled into the dressing room I’d run to him. But he’d sit in a sweaty slumped heap on the couch, a thousand anonymous girls clawing at him. After a while I realised it was only superstition that made him say it. It became a pre-show ritual and if I didn’t ask and he didn’t promise there’d be hell to pay.
The life o
The bars clattered and I jumped, my breath snapping in my throat. I crossed my arms across my chest and drew my knees up to my chin, grit scraping against my rough-hewn pants. I squeezed my eyes shut and I imagined my lashes weaving together. What you can’t see can’t hurt you, right? I tried to tell myself. Another, muted, part of me laughed an absurd laugh, chastising my instincts.
I strained to hear more, but the door had fallen silent. I slowly unfurled, slitting my eyes open. I could not register the strip of empty space between the door and its frame. I could almost feel the new air trickling into my cell, though i
The sound of fingers tapping on glass floats into the darkened room. You rise out of your brown, leather armchair to go and investigate. Walking down the hall, you glance at the derelict mirror on the dresser. A thin, gaunt face looms back at you. A face with sunken eyes and yellowed teeth. As you enter the front room, you find the source of the tapping: a branch outside blowing in the wind. Your stomach rumbles in hunger, commanding you to hunt for food. You enter the kitchen. The subtle smell of mildew and sour milk lingers in the air. A few discarded dishes line the sink and counters.
You pull a can of soup from the cabinet. You notice